If at first you don’t succeed, buy buy again.

You know how you buy stuff sometimes that you really don’t need or want? But you THINK you might need it sometime. Or “my God, it chops, blends and washes the dog, I MUST have it!” So you buy the Thing and then it gets dumped in a drawer ‘coz really the maid chops and your mother blends and you don’t have a dog, but you MIGHT need the Thing so thank God it’s there, in that last drawer collecting dust.

And then one day you dream of a yellow boat. And wake up and you HAVE to use the Thing because it has a yellow label and the dream was clearly a sign. And you reach for it….and it’s not there. And you wonder, well did I put it elsewhere?
A gentle search of a couple of drawers later, you remember you’d lent it to your Mom/sister/best friend/brother who must have borrowed it without asking, the little git. And you march up there and say “Gimme my Thing.”

But shock. They swear they don’t have it.
And you shake your heard, and search again. Fruitlessly. And finally you’re late for work/school/prison aka work, so you figure ok, I’ll search in the evening. And you do, but still don’t find it.

And now the Thing that was once the centre of dust, is now the centre of your obsession. WHERE could it have gone? Did it sprout little legs and walk away? Did we drop it? You keep wondering, also resolving to look up the chances of senility at nearly-28 on the net.

And then one day you give up. It’s 6 months down the line, and finally, weirdly, somehow you need the Thing. Its time has come. But it has gone. Disappeared. So you say, okay, screw it. What am I working for eh? I’ll just splash out on another one.

So you march your loud protesting friends with weird Jap names into the store. And you pick up another one. This one chops, blends, washes the dog and is certified by NASA.
In a self-righteous glow of joyous possession, you waltz home. And open your most important drawer to tuck in your newest Thing. And there lies the old one. In all its solitary dusty glory.

And of course, at this point, Mom/sister/best friend/brother who could have borrowed it without asking but didn’t, the little git, pokes their head around. And say “Oh. There it was. I told you. You never listen to me.”

Finally, you have to give them New Thing just to get them to shut up.
Before tucking Old Thing into the bottom drawer carefully. Because in six months, you’re going to need a chopper, blender, dog washer.